It’s time—when the being known as Lady Gaga descends from the very skies themselves, only to walk and traverse the Earth as we mere mortals do, visiting her hallowed stage show upon city after city, teaching we silly humans how to think and act freely, if only we had 1% of her magic, her brilliance, her art…

Aw, nevermind.  The Gags just announced her North American tour for Born This Way, in which she’ll rip off Madonna and Bowie a lot.  Check out the dates below.

That’s right, Lady Gaga is coming to a city near you.  Dubbed the Born This Way Ball, the tour will launch in Vancouver, and then make its way from the west coast into the Great Middle, in which the combination of Red states and Lady Gaga hopefully won’t bomb the country into oblivion.  The things wind up on the east coast, with Gaga wrapping up around Spring Break time in Florida.  Dig the dates below.

Jan 11—Rogers Arena—Vancouver, British Columbia
Jan. 14—Tacoma Dome—Tacoma, Washington
Jan. 17—HP Pavilion—San Jose, California
Jan. 20—Staples Center—Los Angeles, California
Jan. 23—US Airways Center—Phoenix, Arizona
Jan. 25—MGM Grand Garden Arena—Las Vegas, Nevada
Jan. 29—American Airlines Center—Dallas, Texas
Jan. 31—Toyota Center—Houston, Texas
Feb. 2—Scottrade Center—St. Louis, Missouri
Feb. 4—Spring Center—Kansas City, Missouri
Feb. 6—Xcel Energy Center—St. Paul, Minnesota
Feb. 8—Air Canada Centre—Toronto, Ontario
Feb. 11—Bell Centre—Montreal, Quebec
Feb. 13—United Center—Chicago, Illinois
Feb. 16—Palace Of Auburn Hills—Detroit, Michigan
Feb. 19—Wells Fargo Center—Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Feb. 22—Madison Square Garden—New York, New York
Feb. 25—Verizon Center—Washington, D.C.
Feb. 27—TD Garden—Boston, Massachusetts
Mar. 2—Boardwalk Hall—Atlantic City, New Jersey
Mar. 6—Barclays Center—Brooklyn, New York
Mar. 10—Bridgestone Arena—Nashville, Tennessee
Mar. 11—Philips Arena—Atlanta, Georgia
Mar. 13—Tampa Bay Times Forum—Tampa, Florida
Mar. 15—BankAtlantic Center—Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
March 16—American Airlines Arena—Miami, Florida

Will you be seeing the tour?

Source: The AV Club