Chris Brown Reviews, Interviews & More

Chris Brown Got Arrested For--Get This--Violent Felony Assault

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chris brown
There are some days in which news breaks that is so inexplicable, so fundamentally at odds with the reality of the universe that we’ve come to accept, that we can barely comprehend the information that our brains are attempting to process.  News so shocking, so unprepared-for by our fragile psyches, that it forces us to question the basic precepts and foundation of reality itself.  This...

Chris Brown Is Having Seizures Because You're Being Negative About That...

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chris brown
In a situation that seems as if were created for an Onion headline rather than real ones, last week, Chris Brown threatened to quit music, all because you people won’t quit bugging him about that time he brutally punched, bit, and slammed his then-girlfriend Rihanna’s face into a car door because she had the temerity to look at his cell phone.  Well, add that another...

Chris Brown May Quit Music If People Don't Stop Talking About That Time He...

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Rihanna and Chris Brown 2012
Well, now you’ve done it, America.  You’ve really gone and done it:  Chris Brown announced via Twitter today that, because people are being really uncool and refusing to forgive him for that time he brutally punched, bit, and slammed his then-girlfriend Rihanna’s face into a car door a few years ago, he’s probably going to quit music.  Because you...

Americans Hate Justin Bieber And Chris Brown, According To New Music Poll

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Wrigley Termintates Commercial Deal With Chris Brown
Poor Justin Bieber has been having something of a rough patch these days.  Despite his rabid and fervent army of Beliebers, he’s been getting into more and more skirmishes with the paparazzi, and is-get this, you guys—coming off just a little bit like a spoiled, out of touch, and entitled rich kid.  And it seems that the rest of America is more or less getting sick of him, according to a...

Chris Brown And Drake Are Suing Each Other Over Club Brawl

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Wrigley Termintates Commercial Deal With Chris Brown
When Chris Brown isn’t busy viciously beating and biting Rihanna for looking at his phone, or destroying a green room after an interviewer had the audacity to ask him about the beating, or getting into a parking garage slapfight with Frank Ocean over a parking space, or allegedly skipping out on his community service for Rihanna’s beating, or comparing...

News Roundup: Rihanna And Chris Brown's Single Leaks, Dave Grohl Will Be...

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Dave Grohl
Last week we heard news that some activists in Sweden were plastering pictures with Rihanna's beatup face all around Stockholm. Their goal was to prevent Chris Brown from performing in their town. This week, Rihanna and Chris Brown's newest single, titled "Nobody's Business" (of course!) leaked online. We wonder how those activists feel about the track, which we have for you down...

News Roundup: Rihanna Debuts 'Diamonds' Music Video, Thom Yorke Announces...

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Rihanna
Rihanna released a new music video for "Diamonds," a song from her upcoming album Unapologetic, due out November 19. In the video, Rihanna runs violently, smokes seductively and floats on water. You can see the video below. Also, Thom Yorke announced the release date for the Atoms For Peace record. It'll come out early next year. And Passion Pit announced they were...

News Roundup: Thom Yorke's Atoms For Peace Release New Single, Rihanna And...

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Atoms For Peace
This week, Thom Yorke's side project Atoms For Peace released a new and complicated single titled "Default."  The band also announced the tentative release date for their debut album. Also, the MTV VMAs took place last night and racy pop star Rihanna came out the big winner.   Elsewhere, The Black Keys have announced that they're back in the studio, prepping for an eight...

Chris Brown Insults Rihanna In Freestyle Rant, Gets In A Twitter Spat, And...

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Rihanna and Chris Brown 2012
Proving once again that he’s simply the classiest guy in show business, Chris Brown took time out of his busy schedule trashing green rooms, taking no personal responsibility for domestic assault, and basically taking a leak on any and all forms of good taste in order to drop a some freestyle rhymes on top of a remix of Kanye West’s “Theraflu”—and apparently publicly insulted...

Seth Rogen Criticizes The Grammys And Chris Brown At The Independent Spirit...

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seth rogen
Along with a lot of other people (mostly all the sane people on planet Earth), comic actor Seth Rogen apparently does not care much for rapper Chris Brown and his famous, girlfriend-assaulting, green-room destroying, tantrum-throwing temper.  Nor does he seem to look highly upon the Grammys for continuing to celebrate and award Brown, despite his odious behavior.  And Rogen...

Listen: Rihanna's 'Birthday Cake' Feat. Chris Brown

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Rihanna and Chris Brown 2012
Rihanna and Chris Brown are back together, not officially as a couple – yet – but officially as a duet. Yesterday, the racy singer released, no one, but two remixes featuring her and the man who once treated her like a punching bag. We knew Chris Brown had lent his vocals for her song "Birthday Cake", but what we didn't know was...

Rihanna Angrily Defends Chris Brown On Twitter; Logic Now No Longer Exists

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Rihanna
Last week we reported the news that Rihanna had recorded a new single with Chris Brown, her former boyfriend who A) violently and repetitively punched her in the face, B) repeatedly bit her neck and ear, C) slammed her face over and over again with a car door, D) publicly displayed little to no remorse whatsoever for his actions, or E) all of the above (the answer is E, by...

Chris Brown To Appear On New Rihanna Single; Universe Officially Gives Up...

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Chris Brown-jco-4-1-11
Because he’s a talented singer, dancer and performer who only occasionally will violently and repetitively punch his girlfriend in the face, viciously bite her neck and ear, and then slam her face over and over again against a car door, then destroy a green room when an interviewer has the audacity to ask him about, and THEN begins telling his critics to f*** off on Twitter because he won a...

Rapper Pitbull To Join 'Glee'?

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gleejcoDec9
The rapper known as Pitbull may be joining Glee.  Typically, I like to start off a news post with a little joke, but I felt like that opening sentence just couldn’t be topped in terms of hilarity.  Apparently, the rapper who nabbed the #1 spot on Billboard’s Hot 100 this summer with his hit “Give Me Everything,” is in talks to join the...

Chris Brown Has Meltdown On Twitter About Rihanna, Unsuccessfully Attempts...

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Chris Brown-jco-4-1-11
In spite of the fact that he has a history which indicates nothing but rational, clear-headed thinking (minus, you know, that time his then girlfriend Rihanna looked at his phone and proceeded to viciously and repeatedly punch her in the face, bit her neck and ear, and then slam her face repeatedly against a car door; or that one time when a journalist asked him about the above incident and he...

MTV VMAs: Beyonce Is Pregnant, 'Hunger Games' Gets A Trailer, Chris Brown...

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wj-news-1023-2008
Sexual reproduction—homo sapiens have been using this process of meiosis and fertilization to genetically further our species since we first originated in Africa some 200,000 years ago.  It is a method of reproduction that has generated such historically and culturally significant human beings as Gandhi, Napoleon, Alexander the Great, William Shakespeare, Adolf Hitler, Mother...

Chris Brown To Star In A Romantic Comedy

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Chris Brown-jco-4-1-11
Because, hey, who doesn’t think of vicious domestic assault and public temper tantrums in which chairs are thrown through windows when watching romantic comedies,  Chris Brown has decided to punch his way into our collective hearts by staring in a rom-com.

Rihanna Faces Controversy And Criticism Over 'Man Down' Video

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Rihanna Loud
Rihanna is being forced to defend her latest music video, “Man Down,” as it opens with a man being shot in the head, something that people with a lot of free time on their hands (aka, Parents Television Council) are decrying as “disturbing” and demanding that BET stop airing the clip.